Where there are holes in the toilets. Toilets. Video: Do-it-yourself country wooden toilet

I started an article about toilets because my homeland greeted me at the Kyiv airport with gray toilet paper and a broken toilet seat. The idea of ​​my compatriots was initially good: this very seat had to rotate, be sterilized and return to its previous position hygienically clean. To paraphrase the quote: the idea was cool, but it turned out - as always, through the butt.

Therefore, I was not lazy and read how toilet service was assessed by those who had already tried the benefits of civilization abroad. And I was incredibly surprised at how much progress had come! I thought that the rotating toilet ring was a masterpiece of design! It turns out that there are even more wonderful developments, to which foreign residents have long been accustomed, but which seem to us to be a miracle of technology or a purely local invention, depending on how you look at it. First things first.

Hole in the floor on the pedestal

I have gotten out of the habit of toilets built according to the “Asian style”. I learned that a hole in the floor, that is, a porcelain water closet on a pedestal, is called that way from women’s forums, where the problem of hygiene was discussed.

Hmmm. Hygiene. No matter how you aim, splashes in a flat toilet fly half a meter, especially with good pressure. It’s extremely dangerous to aim at a hole where it’s unclear what’s splashing, because the splashes from there ricochet into what’s most, so to speak, intimate. From the forums I learned a detail that made me laugh: unshaven girls take less risks. But for those who know how to do their business on a bucket so that it “moves,” according to one of the participants, it is better not to come to such a toilet. This really increases the risk rebound infection(the term was coined by me).

By the way, about hitting the target: I had a belated feeling of understanding of our stern army sergeant major, who trained rural recruits to carefully recover in such a latrine. This exercise was performed with a pencil tied to the back of a belt with a string. “Hey, sit down! Two stood up.” The pencil had to fit clearly into the neck of the bottle. And what? It helped.

But another exercise that helped coordinate the butt as it should was even better... with a toothbrush - you did it yourself, you wash it yourself. This is how tidiness was taught. Apparently some girls need such exercises. It happened like this: I opened the toilet door and... quickly closed it, curling my lips into a bunch with my other hand to hold back the urge to vomit. Horror.

Asian toilets

So, this type of toilet is called Asian, and in developed Asian countries it sometimes looks different: the nest is located sideways to the door, and the channel runs under a whole row of stalls. They say that in Japan no one sees anything unnatural in the fact that flushing occurs in a straight inclined line through all the booths in turn, and visitors sit sideways to the door.

But this is already a relic, as experienced orientalists say. Now in Japan, Singapore and South Korea, all toilets have become not only free for the most part, but also very scientifically organized. Here is one of them, in my opinion, very nice.

There is even a virtual simulator in which you can practice pressing the flush, bidet and warm air dry buttons in turn (click on the link, you won’t regret it!). Yes! In the case of drying, there may simply be no paper in the toilet. Wait, dear ones, until the hairdryer will dry your butt. For the first time I see real confirmation of the expression “the stomach is blown by the wind.” No, it’s better more romantic: “gone with the wind.”

And during the sounds made by the stomach, either music or sounds of nature are automatically turned on. Moreover, the toilet ring not only disinfects itself, but also heats up to a pleasant temperature. This is just a giant leap from holes in the pedestal to a super-modern WC. Asian phenomenon.

European toilets

In Germany, I rarely go to paid toilets; my area extends mainly to autobahn parking lots. There “conveniences” are made of durable alloy steel. They have no wear and tear. Everything is extremely simple and free. At train stations, thrifty German women, smiling slyly, hold the “toll” door with a coin acceptor and let each other through for free. They let me through too, and in a fit of nobility I let the next lady through at the exit, also for free.

As our people from France write, it is under no circumstances recommended to do this there! The fact is that smart toilet stalls are equipped with the latest technology. They give three signals: free, busy and cleaning. Cleaning is carried out immediately after the exiting person crosses the threshold. If you manage to run into the booth, knocking over the exiting client, there is a risk of getting caught in a hygienic wash with cleaning products.

The smart toilet, of course, will quickly stop cleaning, and the door will open in emergency mode, but it will still have time to wet the unfortunate visitor. And one more thing: there is no drain button. As one seasoned lady shares, she stubbornly pressed the button with a droplet design, and came out with the unpleasant feeling of an “unflushed toilet.” But after she left, the toilet hummed and shook for a long time. He was apparently doing some general cleaning, since he was “asked” to do so. Knowledgeable people warn: “toilet” in French sounds about the same, but the word “Sortie” means exit. Like this - ask where the toilet is, and they will send you straight to the exit. Take a closer look. In the photo there is a toilet near the Eiffel Tower.

Free toilets can be found in McDonald's throughout Europe, including in Ukraine. There I first experienced how a powerful hand dryer works, I thought it would blow the meat off the bones. Dries your palms in a split second. If necessary, you can go to any cafeteria, but it is considered good form to buy at least some small change in an establishment where there is a toilet, so as not to go in “just for the sake of it,” otherwise it is easy to catch a sideways glance, or even a reprimand.

African toilets

On the African continent I have only visited Egypt. Our bus traveled for eight hours through the desert. We went to Oasis Siwa. It was a wonderful trip, and the oasis was simply a miracle of nature - a shallow lake right in the middle of the desert. Near the lake there are houses of an unknown architect, but of known purpose. I went there and came out in bewilderment. Unclear. There is a house, but there is nothing in it. Just nothing at all - clean, smooth sand.

A bearded old man in a snow-white turban showed me - come back and do your business. And then, oh mommies. He came in with a bucket, carefully took out the sand with “my business” with a shovel and again sprinkled the remaining area with clean white sand. And all this with dignity. I stood and watched blankly. It’s good that the instructor gave a quiet command: “tip.” Then it dawned on me - this is a paid toilet! Water in the desert needs to be saved, but there is a sea of ​​sand here.

And another example from the same trip. On the way back, take us to a checkpoint not far from the highway. There, thin soldiers carried a whole row of buckets of water to the now familiar to us normal “Asian toilet” - with holes on the pedestal. A bucket for each tourist. Honestly, I was uncomfortable. The thin soldiers also behaved with great dignity, but the guide forbade us from giving them tips. Instead we gave the thin wad of Egyptian pounds to the fat sergeant. Hazing, however.

In Egypt, a simple way of making money is common: at the entrance to a public toilet there is a local old man or woman, very clean and handsome, I would say, dressed up. They bow and hand out good toilet paper to visitors. For this you are supposed to give change. I think that they clean there, but unlike our grandmothers, who feel like queens of a gas station paid toilet, these old people evoke respect and sympathy.

Our grandmothers usually command: “Stop, where? Don't you see everything nests busy!" Or like this: “Where did I rewind so much paper! Come on put it down, I’ll tear it off for you myself.” I experienced this in Odessa at the station, and my Germans were almost arrested by the guards because they, such scoundrels, were breaking into the toilet during cleaning. They had to uncivilly relieve themselves under the tree, where they again ran into vigilant law enforcement officers.

The station security guards interrogated me with passion: “What, in Germany you are allowed to urinate under trees?” I said out of anger that yes, there are even sculptures of boys peeing. And in general, we pour pots straight out of the windows.

And finally, a couple of photos. One, as you can see, shows a pot being poured out by an invisible hand right from the top window, I didn’t lie! This is a fountain made with a fair amount of humor. (In fact, for relieving yourself in the wrong place, the police mercilessly fine the violator 25 euros).
And the second two pictures are Russian toilets: on Red Square and just bio-toilets. Very typical.
In one of them, the grandmother on duty set up a service house for herself.

Oh, these bio-toilets, have you ever been to them? After all, you have to screw your “ bio valve"to a minimum, otherwise terrible splashes fly from below, ugh. You also have to hang half-bent, while relaxing as much as possible. To do this, you need to kick off your butt in a question mark pose and cling to the dirty door with your hands, brrrr.

Well, I took my breath away and complained. Didn't I kill you too much with the details? I forgot to warn you at the beginning: It is better not to read for the squeamish and impressionable . I'm sorry, it's boiling, it's a shame for the state. After all, we call these places conveniences, but they don’t even smell like conveniences. That is, it doesn’t smell like amenities there at all. But, to the credit of many supermarkets, as well as city entertainment centers, I note that many things have changed for the better in my country, including toilets.

Secrets of the public toilet. October 22nd, 2016

Today, large public toilets can be found, perhaps, only in shopping and entertainment centers. These soulless, clean, sparkling glass and tile structures serve only to satisfy natural needs. I went in, relieved myself, and left. But just recently, every visit to a public toilet was extremely exciting!

For many years, the men's room was a place where, secluded in a cramped cubicle and looking at the drawings on its walls, you could learn a lot and have a good laugh. And if you have deviations in sexual orientation, you could find a soul mate here, or a friend for a romantic adventure.
Today such toilets have disappeared, they have been destroyed by progress. But sometimes, if you're lucky, you can still stumble upon a surviving fragment of that rich toilet culture that was once an integral part of every public toilet. I was recently brought into such an oasis by chance.

At the entrance you are greeted with a categorical warning about the absence of benefits and the presence of a motion sensor to ensure that no one urinates for free. Having paid fifteen rubles, you find yourself in the waiting room. Here you understand that public service workers know how to decorate their workplace like no one else!

Naive flower garlands and plastic grapes on a burlap backing prepare you to enter the wonderful world of a real Soviet toilet - a place of communication, relief, and flirtation. In the very first booth on the wall, right at the eye level of the person sitting, we are greeted by something beautiful:

A certain man boasts of his throat blowjob skills and offers to demonstrate his talents to everyone. True, it is not entirely clear what caused the trembling of his hands while writing this text, perhaps excitement from the upcoming meeting, or maybe the fact that the submitter of this announcement was combining business with pleasure in the process?

The next writer found it necessary to specify his gender, as if the recipient might assume that the ad was written by a woman. In any case, “Serious M” does not give up hope for reciprocity.

But for some reason he doesn’t answer calls, offering to write SMS. Apparently, this makes some sense, because the next lonely soul, who did not skimp on a permanent marker, also prefers to communicate via text messages.

I thought that “pen pals” were something from the distant past... But who will understand them, these toilet writers, their thoughts are foggy, their souls are mysterious.

But the next announcement is full of determination, its author is ready to do it with two at once!

I believe that such an offer of a simultaneous game speaks of a strong and fearless character. Among other things, it is worth noting that after a while the grandmaster returned to the safe house in the booth and added a new phone number. Perhaps the previous appearance was unsuccessful, and the resident was forced to flee from a jealous suitor.

But in the toilet, as in life, you can run into something like this - someone shared their desire to part with anal virginity, and having aroused maximum interest in themselves, they did not leave any contacts. I believe that the readers of these advertisements were quite upset by this fact.

Some inscriptions are not without playful frivolity; one rather proud friend added a couple of flirty hearts to his proposal.

Apparently, in this way this user of the toilet message board lets others know that he is not a stranger to romance.

To my regret, some of the advertisements on these walls have already suffered from time, and it is no longer possible to understand who was going to give a blowjob to whom there...

One can only guess what happened there - harsh reality, armed with a painter's brush, prevented the reunion of loving hearts, or the author did not update his ad because he had finally found his great and pure love?

At the end of this exciting excursion, already at the exit, you are faced with two mirrors, between which a notice in red simply screams at you, prohibiting you from drinking water and washing your feet.

It seems that the pederasts, excited by reading the advertisements, go home, thirsty and with unwashed feet.

In conclusion, I have to admit that the paintings in this particular toilet are still very poor, and have a narrowly focused theme, limited only to the search for same-sex love. This is just a pale shadow of what could be seen in toilets some twenty years ago. For example, the heterosexual humor that was once rich in such places is completely absent; jokes and aphorisms, as well as drawings of female genital organs, are completely absent. Apparently, we have already lost this layer of outhouse culture irretrievably. But once upon a time the rich painting of toilet walls even brought to life a wonderful verse:

Writing on toilet walls
Alas, friends, no wonder.
Among the shit, you are all poets.
Among poets, you are shit!

I remember in those years when I could already read, but still understood little about adult relationships, every trip to a public toilet became for me an excursion into the forbidden world of mysterious adult pictures and incomprehensible words, vaguely guessed jokes and vague concepts.

Today, this seething source of the living folk word has dried up forever. Unfortunately, “folk” humor moved to the Internet, was replicated across millions of identical sites, and became inexpressive, insipid, and boring. And only horny fagots are still looking for each other in the twilight of public toilets...

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People talk little and reluctantly about such an ordinary place as a toilet. What can I say, everything is clear, but it’s somehow inconvenient. Meanwhile, toilets have a long history, they are a noticeable part of everyday life and culture in general, and much more happens in them than is provided for by their functions...

It is estimated that every person spends from several months to three years in the toilet during his life.

CULTURAL LEISURE

Public toilets are colorful places. Different categories, for people of different incomes and, it seems, upbringing corresponding to the income. In any case, comfortable toilets look tidier than shabby establishments, where you will find paper scattered on the floor, a broken mirror, and all sorts of traces of hasty or improper use of this place.

But visitors to non-luxury restrooms are much more savvy and creative. Dull interior? Let's decorate it ourselves! And drawings and inscriptions appear that will entertain, surprise, and even make you think.

It all started with the inscriptions.

More precisely, with one of them. The announcement in bold handwriting on the wall of the booth read: “Girls, I’m a cool guy, something to suck, 27 cm, *phone number*.” Who left the message? Women's toilet. Therefore, it was either the cleaner/owner/sanitary inspector who wrote, or a brave male who sneaked in secretly and doesn’t care about anything when he needs to give the girls a holiday, or someone’s girlfriend at the insistent request. Of course, it was worth taking a photo of the inscription, but this thought did not come immediately. But then it turned out that it was not original: even Stephen King collected similar examples of creativity - he has a whole collection.

In general, toilet inscriptions and drawings serve as material for scientific work. Yes, yes, they are found during archaeological excavations, studied, considered as examples of writing. At the beginning of the 20th century, the first articles on this topic were published in scientific journals. Now, for example, a completely serious hypothesis claims that in this way a person realizes a territorial instinct: having found himself in a place where the “marks” of different individuals are felt, he wants to leave a memory of himself. But, as a cultural person, he uses other means of expression than the bestial people. However, they too. Sometimes...

Another motive is revenge: an angry girl or guy, after his partner’s betrayal, leaves his rival’s/rival’s phone number. But this is only one of the options; anyone can lose their anger, without love or jealousy. Perhaps it was anger that motivated the author of the inscription from the beginning of the article, and the 27-centimeter sucking tool was sported by an employee dissatisfied with her boss or by a grandmother who accidentally got hold of the number of a noisy neighbor.

Here are some examples of inscriptions.

	"I just fucked an Alien"
	“This is more disgusting than my original message.”
	Technologies can develop this far
	“...Our penetration of the planet Particularly noticeable in the distance: In a public toilet in Paris There are inscriptions in Russian!..."

There is another type of “inscriptions in the toilet” - search engines usually understand this request – announcements “from the administration”. Lately, many of them have been written in a humorous manner. The jokes, however, are most often mediocre or tired: Cheops are called upon to wash away their pyramids, men are told “don’t flatter yourself, come closer,” they constantly mention the goals set and the results achieved. However, there are also more inventive inscriptions.

A clip about drawings and inscriptions - a creepy incident in the men's room.

There is also a playful cartoon about the adventures of a drawn penis looking for a girlfriend in the toilet. .

The evolution of toilets is an interesting phenomenon. Public and domestic toilets and “private” accessories for needs in the history of mankind were very different and original, as were the customs associated with them. It is hardly possible to consider the entire history of toilets and the corresponding culture in one article, so we will only slightly lift the veil of secrecy so that readers can make the rest of the discoveries themselves.

In ancient Rome, the public toilet did not have partitions; stone seats were located around the perimeter. Some eminent citizens had their own toilet seats, which the slaves warmed with their bodies. The waste ended up in water canals, but from there it was discharged into the river. Meetings were made in the toilets, deals were made - one might say, these were places for communication. Visiting them was not cheap and was affordable for wealthy people, while others used vessels installed on the streets, which were cleaned by special people for a lot of money.

Europe of the Middle Ages and later was, as we know, not the most fragrant place. They relieved themselves in pots, and their contents were thrown into the streets - there were very few cesspools.

Even in the Louvre there were no toilets. Kings and courtiers and monarchs did everything wherever the need came, be it a park or a palace corridor. From time to time, all its noble residents left the Louvre, and the palace was washed and ventilated.

It happened that kings held receptions while sitting on a potty, so as not to be distracted from either one or another important activity.

In some houses, cesspools were made, and they were located under the floor. The smell in the rooms was appropriate. In 1183, a tragicomic story happened in Erfurt Castle in Germany: the floor rotted under the influence of evaporating sewage, and Emperor Frederick and his subjects fell into a cesspool. The emperor was not injured, but some of his subjects choked.

Eventually, the profession of goldsmith appeared. These workers cleaned the pits and scraped the mines of sewage. No safety measures were taken, and the goldsmiths quickly died from infections.

In Japan, for a long time, the toilet was replaced by a garbage dump. In the 7th century, the first channels began to appear to drain sewage coming from “toilets” - long narrow pits. “River houses” were also built on bridges across large canals. In some areas of the country, the houses lasted until the mid-20th century.

In a Zen monastery, toilets existed as buildings, the rules for their use were clearly outlined. The cassock should have been removed and hung at the entrance. The need was supposed to be relieved on squatting, while it was forbidden to laugh and sing songs, as well as spit and write on the walls. They were supposed to wipe themselves with paper or a bamboo board. After everything, you had to wash the vessel with your left hand, and upon leaving the room, your hands “in seven waters: three times with ash, three times with earth, once with pods.”

Currently, many houses and some apartments in Japan have “Japanese-type” toilets, that is, in the form of a bathtub in the floor.

Islamic toilet etiquette describes all options for action when relieving yourself: what prayer to read when entering the toilet, and what to say when leaving; enter with the left foot, exit with the right; cleanse yourself with stones or something that can replace them, for example, paper - at least three times - and wash with water; which direction should you look in and what items should you not bring with you? and much more. You should not talk on the fly, urinate against the wind, or use your right hand when wiping. It is forbidden to perform services near graves and fruit-bearing trees. It is prohibited to urinate in standing water, and also near springs. And other things that are unlikely to even come to mind: for example, it is specifically stated that you cannot wipe yourself with excrement or food.

When finished, you need to wash not only the back, but also the front: the penis should be washed “from root to tip” at least three times, and shaken three times.

Remembering these details is probably easier than taking everything into account at once, but people manage somehow.

In Russia, until the 20th century, the toilet was called a “latrine”, “retiradnik” or “outhouse”. The outhouses were located in the corner of the houses and fenced off with a two- or three-layer wall to prevent the bad smell from penetrating. There was a pipe going up that protruded high above the roof to ventilate the smell. To protect from rain, a copper canopy was made over the pipe, like an umbrella. In the outhouse there was a seat with a cut oval hole, and under it there were large copper funnels connected to a pipe. Everything from the pipe went into a large cesspool deep under the house, lined with stone.

- With the advent of taller houses, toilets were often organized in unexpected places: for example, on the back staircase (in a niche near the window, while the toilet did not have a door) or on the balcony. Such balcony toilets are still preserved in the old cities of Italy.

Gradually, toilets moved into apartments: toilets (then called closets) had a valve, thanks to which odors did not pass into the room, and later flushing was invented.

By the way, the first water-flush toilet was made back in the 16th century for Queen Elizabeth I, although water had to be poured into the tank yourself. However, the queen was reluctant to use the invention - she was afraid that someone would crawl through the hole and take her virginity.

GIVE ME THE PAPER

Toilet paper, of course, also did not appear immediately. For a long time, leaves of plants and trees were used, and even now this classic method is suitable for “hiking conditions”.

In ancient Rome, they used a sponge on a stick, which was rinsed and kept in a bucket of salt water. Sometimes birds were kept in public toilets, and visitors used their feathers and down. The rich wiped themselves with scented wool or cotton.

The ancient Scandinavians used fur and sheep's wool.

The Japanese distinguished themselves again - they wiped themselves with wood. In a figurative sense, of course: for a long time in Japan they wrote on wooden tablets. After a long period of use, when the inscriptions were scraped off every now and then and the board became thinner, it was eventually cut into long narrow strips, which acted as toilet paper. Sometimes algae was used for the same purpose.

In Europe, ordinary people tried their best: leaves, grass, hay, snow, fruit peels - everything went into action. Richer people used “disposable” woolen tampons or “reusable” scarves. Louis XIV wiped himself with lace handkerchiefs, which were immediately thrown away.

The Chinese emperors also loved luxury - they used paper, which for a long time was not cheap.

In Russia, until the 19th century, toilet paper was not used - the same hay and grass were used for the poor, silk shreds for the rich.

For a long time, American settlers wiped themselves with corn cobs - they still remember these cobs if they want to hint at someone’s “folk” roots.

Toilet paper as such appeared in 1857 in New York in the form of square napkins. In Europe, in 1928, the production of paper in rolls began, and for a long time they were embarrassed to ask for it in stores, and the manufacturer suggested calling the paper by the brand name - “Hackle”, after which sales began to improve. In France, the bidet remained popular for a long time. However, foreigners most often saw bidets in brothels, and therefore assumed that they were intended only for women. For a long time, the bidet was banned for men, and only in the second half of the twentieth century it began to be used more widely.

I CARRY WITH ME

Another element of hygiene worth noting is a portable mini-toilet. Since now, for obvious reasons, it is difficult to see them anywhere, let us explain what we are talking about. For example, in Japan, where it was impossible to organize a permanent toilet in the houses of aristocrats, and clothes would not allow them to use it independently, large wooden pencil cases filled with ash were used. The pencil case had a handle. When a rich owner or mistress wanted to relieve themselves, the servants lifted numerous wrappers and capes with a special pole, after which they pushed the pencil case. In Europe, ladies could take with them oblong vessels with a handle, similar to gravy boats, called “bourdalues” - named after the French orator who could talk for so long that the ladies had to use the vessel during his speech. True, then the contents could be thrown out directly onto the floor.

SOVIET REALITY

In the Soviet Union, bathrooms in standard apartment buildings, in principle, met hygiene standards. Of course, this was the case in cities, and residents of remote villages sometimes needed time to get used to the toilet after using a wooden stall.

Boguchan Fedya and Nyura did not go further, so they looked at the world with slightly different eyes than residents of big cities. They saw the railway only in the movies, but they looked at the plane like a Muscovite in a taxi: pay three rubles and fly to the regional center for shopping. When Nyura broke her leg, an ambulance arrived for her by helicopter. At the age of twelve, Fedya already knew a lot about the structure of a spaceship, but one day, looking at a photograph of a high-rise building in a magazine, he asked:
- Grandfather! How is it that people from the twentieth floor run to meet their needs?
The fact is that even in the regional center, the tallest buildings had no more than two floors, there was no sewage system, and in each yard, in the far corner, there was a wooden booth. Grandfather, an experienced man who had gone through the war, explained that similar devices in big cities are located directly in the apartment.
- How is this possible?! - Fedya was indignant. - Is there a need in the house itself?! About “hygiene”!
He had to tell him about the structure of the sewerage system and toilet, which Fedya had never even seen in a movie, and this amazed him more than all the wonders of cybernetics and astronaut flights.

But the public restrooms of that time, and in quite visible places like the Palaces of Culture, now seem like a prehistoric phenomenon. Here, for example, are the memories of one Italian:

How can I not remember my first stay in Moscow in 1988. The leaders of our national group at the Pushkin Institute brought us all to Arbat, where we bought toilet paper for the next six months. At this moment, some of my comrades began to doubt the “Soviet paradise” that they believed in despite Reagan’s propaganda about the “evil empire.”
A visit to the Lenin Library was then mandatory for young foreign specialists. Long hours of studying meant taking breaks, and the toilets (two floors above) could be found without signs. When there was a large influx of people in need, it was unsafe to stand in line: as the famous Chinese proverb says, sooner or later you will see the corpse of an enemy (in this case, your neighbor’s liquid waste) floating down the river. Book request forms were used for non-research purposes.
But the most shocking sight appeared to me in the toilets at three stations, where visitors were forced to sit directly on the toilet, covering themselves with newspapers - there were no doors in the “booths” with half-meter walls. It was then that I realized the level of disrespect the Soviet state had for its citizens.

However, a relaxed attitude towards such intimate moments (was) not unique to Russians. For example, now our man, who has visited China, said the following:

As for the toilet topic, in relation to China, these are very contrasting impressions... I agree that by the “latrine” one can judge the culture of this society as a whole, but not the Chinese one. The first thing that struck me was the toilets on Chinese trains. Perfectly polished sparkling chrome... holes in the floor. Yes, yes, not our toilet-like structures, but a steel platform and a neat “point”. Everything was clean, and most importantly, it turned out to be very convenient. Everything hit the target exactly.
A little later, I was amazed by the toilets in the hotel - completely Europeanized flush toilets, only somehow narrower. However, even the baths there are smaller than ours - this is due to the size of the local population.
But what struck me most was the “common” student toilet at the university where I taught. A sort of stone house on campus, with an entrance without doors and... no partitions, booths, or anything at all. Along the entire stone canopy there is a stone trough, above which my students sit peacefully, philosophizing and doing big and small things! And not the slightest embarrassment. And no one washes anything away - there is nothing with... Once an hour, the towering piles of “good” are washed away with a thick hose by a special worker. And so on all day. Needless to say, I never relieved myself of it, but I remembered it for the rest of my life.

The principle of the Chinese toilet.

That's it, simple and unpretentious. In some places, visitors flush after themselves.

After this, is it any wonder that “paired Olympic toilets” in Sochi have become so popular? The administration of the sports center, of course, hastened to announce that they simply did not have time to install partitions in the toilet, but residents of the former USSR, who remember the glorious past, have reason to doubt.

ME AND JO

There are still gender differences between toilets, beyond the markings on the door and the presence/absence of urinals. This includes the length of time visitors stay and how the premises are used “for extraneous activities.”

The line for the women's restroom is longer than the line for the men's. This is a well-known phenomenon, and the most savvy designers suggest organizing more seats in the women's toilet than in the men's. There are, of course, “women’s urinals” or special funnels for women that allow you to urinate while standing, but they are still few in number.

The reasons for the crowd in the “ladies’ rooms” are obvious, and in order not to bore readers with the enumeration, we will present a picture.

Men are also very intrigued by such an interesting habit of girls as going to the toilet in pairs. Again, you can find a dozen completely logical reasons: girlfriends hold each other’s outerwear, purse, and can help fasten something hard to reach...

And here's how men imagine it:

Another remarkable gender-specific feature of toilets is the so-called “Glory hole”, in simple terms – a hole in the wall of a booth for anonymous sex. They are located at the appropriate height and are most often organized in men's restrooms. In exceptional cases - in public restrooms or between women's and men's toilets, where they are used for heterosex, however, this is more of a topic for porn films. But for gays in different countries, toilets have long been one of the few places for “meetings.”

The novelty, ease of communication and ease of organizing such a meeting still remain attractive aspects of male toilet sex. It is enough to “know the place”, go there and wait a little... - and so on at least every day. In addition, in this case it is not necessary to be handsome - rather, the attractiveness of the rod of love will be assessed.

Of course, the first requirement for any adequate person is compliance with safety measures during such sex, which is even more important than in any other cases. However, human carelessness knows no bounds, and toilets remain possible sources of any sexual infection.

The theme of sex in the toilet is also reflected in fiction books and films, mainly Western ones. But more, of course, it is exploited as an element of fantasy and the plot of “documentary films,” and in some sex shops and porn cinemas such holes are specially provided.

Those who are suddenly shocked by the idea that men have sex in the toilet should know that women sometimes give birth in toilets... and do not always go to witness the newborn; on the contrary, the toilet is chosen to hide the fact of birth, and without any traces But this topic is more suitable for crime reports, so we won’t dwell on it.

IT'S GOOD TO BE A KITTY, IT'S GOOD TO BE A DOG

Having learned to do their business elegantly, people began to demand the same from their pets. And what’s interesting is that the animals went to meet them halfway.

Decent owners are known to clean up after their dogs outside. The question is important - in the comedy “Black Envy” one of the heroes makes a lot of money on a spray that eliminates dog poop. But in Europe, respectable owners are beginning to worry about possible fraud. The fact is that in some countries it is planned to have cards with DNA data for all domestic animals. The cards will be kept by veterinarians, and by analyzing the pile lying in the middle of the street, city services will be able to determine which dog was not cleaned up after. And since not everyone expects absolute honesty from city employees, some believe that they are capable of taking dog poop out of the trash can, putting it back on the ground and, having recorded the fact, demand a fine from the owner for polluting the streets. Whether these fears are justified, time will tell.

CREATIVE

The toilet and all the details of this side of life have long excited the human imagination. A couple of the most striking examples where profit and benefit are combined. Perhaps this will encourage you to come up with something new! The Modern Toilet restaurant chain is developing in Taiwan. In them, visitors sit on chairs made in the shape of toilets, eat from bidet plates, drink cocktails from urinal glasses, and wipe their mouths with toilet paper. Strange as the idea may seem, restaurants are very popular, and the owner of the chain, Wang Tziwei, generally believes that the toilet is exactly the place where a person’s appetite comes. Ardern Healthcare has developed a special package for managing minor needs. For just six dollars you can solve such a serious problem as the inability to go to the toilet, for example, in a car. The composition in the package will turn the liquid into an odorless gel; with a certain dexterity, women can also use the new product. The size of the package allows you to carry it in your purse and even in your pocket.

KILLER TOILETS

...as well as self-mutilators. Yes, this place is unsafe: for example, more than 40 thousand injuries associated with using the toilet occur annually in the United States. Murders, suicides and simply unexpected deaths from natural causes, including from too much pushing on the potty... But other dangers may lurk: slippery floors, poorly secured plumbing or damaged electrical equipment, flimsy partitions, narrow spaces... Yes and the visitors themselves are the cause of their injuries.

So, in Grodno, a drunk man went to the toilet, fell between the wall and the toilet and fell asleep, and when he woke up, he could not get out. Rescuers had to be called to the scene.

Another victim, a Muscovite, was sober, but not of the age or health to engage in acrobatics. The pensioner's cane broke. He decided to fix it and went to the toilet for glue and paint. He stood on the toilet with his feet, after which one of his slippers fell off and his foot fell into the toilet manifold. To top it off, the tank broke and the man found himself in a puddle of cold water. For three hours he called for help and knocked on the floor until the neighbors heard. They tried to knock down the door but it didn’t work. The Ministry of Emergency Situations was called, and they broke the balcony glass to get into the apartment. At four in the morning, the pensioner, with cut fingers and a swollen leg, was rescued.

The case of the girl under whom the toilet broke and cut her thigh is also not an isolated one. The photographs of this thigh are so eloquent that we did not post them, but anyone can find them if they search for “don’t put your feet on the toilet.” They perfectly illustrate this warning.

However, you should also sit down on the seat carefully. Not everywhere yet there are overhead disposable circles or automatically sliding polyethylene. Cautious people carry wet wipes with them to a public toilet, put down toilet paper, or... at least carefully watch where they sit, because toilet humor takes different forms. In one of the American supermarkets, a 40-year-old woman stuck her buttocks to a plastic seat, which a joker (or joker?) had smeared with superglue. Only 25 minutes later another woman came into the restroom and the victim was able to call for help. They did not release her soon: the doctors had to put the lady on a stretcher along with a toilet seat and spray a special aerosol to separate the skin from the plastic. Small pieces of leather remained on the seat.

Take care of yourself!

EARTH IN THE PORTHOLE

In space, people's daily needs remain the same, and "elimination of surplus" is one of them. Former astronaut Mike Mullan, who gives lectures, says he gets questions about space toilets ten times more often than questions about whether he's met aliens or whether astronauts have actually landed on the moon. Even the husband of the Queen of England, Prince Philip, when visiting the astronaut training center, was interested in how “this” happens in space.

Unlike earthly plumbing, where a water drain is used, in zero gravity everything is decided by the flow of air, acting on the principle of a vacuum cleaner. The toilet is similar to a regular one, but with foot mounts and seats adjusted to fit the astronauts’ buttocks. You can urinate in a special funnel with a hose. The sewage system separates solid waste from liquid: solid waste in American shuttles is compressed, stored on board, and unloaded after landing. Liquid waste is currently simply thrown into outer space, but over time NASA hopes to find a way to recycle it. In the meantime, according to one of the astronauts, the release of urine in the sun's rays is a wonderful sight. The fact is that in space liquid freezes instantly. And from the ISS, a container with excrement was always thrown into outer space and gradually flew to Earth, burning up in the atmosphere. Someone could very well see this and think they were observing a meteorite. Air from toilets is filtered to remove bacteria and odor before entering living spaces. During launch and landing, astronauts wear adult diapers. They came to this by trial and error - one astronaut in his memoirs says that once at the dawn of the space age, the launch was delayed for a long time, and he was eventually allowed to urinate in his spacesuit, which knocked down all the sensors.

A LOOK INTO THE FUTURE

Who said there would be a need for them? Human genius is capable of more!

Perhaps toilets will remain only for fans of “natural farming” of past centuries. Genetic engineering and physics can make life better.

Genetic Engineering.

Food production technologies are becoming more and more advanced. It is possible that sooner or later all products will become completely digestible. There will be no “waste” emissions, or they will be reduced to a minimum, or they will simply become hygienically clean. All tasks can be done in the palm of your hand or in a small bag, and then put in a bucket or lowered into the sink, and wash your hands over it. And in the future they will come up with flavored secretions. The liquid will become cologne, the solid will become soap. Such purity of products can be achieved either by genetically modifying plants and animals in the desired direction, or by using special food additives.

Physics.

Teleportation will not only shorten distances between cities, countries and people - it will abolish toilets with their complex sewage systems. A tiny chip sewn under the skin will help adjust settings and remove liquid and solid waste from the body, and at any distance from the outlets. If desired, neither the urethra nor the rectum will ever come into contact with unwanted substances in their entire lives, which will be teleported straight into collectors specially created for this purpose. Underground pipes and expensive cleaning systems will become unnecessary. And since the collectors will collect real organic material, without any impurities, it can be used for any need, from fertilizing the soil to - who knows? – production of perfumes and even products.

Japanese scientist Mitsuyuki Ikeda has made a hamburger from human feces, which he says is rich in protein produced by bacteria found in feces. The “meat” underwent repeated tastings at different stages of development. According to volunteers, in the latter version - with soy additives - it tastes like beef.

British artist Jemmy Nicholas is already selling perfume made from his own feces for $65 per 60 ml bottle. All customers are satisfied with the delicate, slightly bitter aroma.

In addition, work is currently underway to create biodiesel and methane fuel from human excrement.

Urine is not far behind its cousin: it was recently announced that four African schoolgirls had built a generator to generate electricity from urine. “Blood for robots,” rocket fuel and self-healing rubber – and that’s not all that such a simple yellow liquid can give us!

If people come up with cheaper sources of food and energy, then they can get rid of “organic matter” by sending it directly to the center of the Sun. Everything there will burn without a trace. In the future, with the development of technology, the excess will be teleported to other star systems and even to neighboring galaxies.

Do you have any doubts? In vain!

Science works wonders.

Public toilets as a way to diversify life and tickle your nerves

W→O→S is not as far from everything everyday as it might seem. We went out into the public and tried out the new style of city toilets, remembered those moments in life when the toilet played an important role, and compiled a guide for those who want to add variety to their lives.

Like we have.
The experience of Nikita Koltsov

Public toilets are in full operation in Moscow new type . The blue plastic of Toi Toya gave way to golden metal, and the unfortunate woman of pre-retirement age in a woolen shawl turned into a silent machine dispensing cards of the Troika type with the proud inscription “City Toilet”. Just don’t even think about buying it if you’re already stuck - the card is printed very slowly, and besides, it will take some time to figure out this whole system. The payment terminal looks more like a space shuttle control panel.

A visit will cost 40 rubles, but you can charge the card for more “trips” and receive a discount. So for two uses you need to pay 60 rubles, for three - 90 rubles, and for four for some reason 150. In general, the city authorities do not spare those who like to use the toilet to the maximum.

A real revelation awaits you inside. A heated room, a urinal (!), a cosmic plastic washbasin and a clean toilet without blue liquid. Not every apartment is equipped with a bathroom with this level of comfort. But if you like to sit for a long time with a volume of Baudrillard, I hasten to disappoint you. Your stay in the kingdom of hygiene is limited to ten minutes, after which the “Free” sign outside will light up bright green, the door will automatically open, and a group of homeless people will pour in to drink and have a decadent group sex.

Because you deserve it

In the center of Moscow you can pamper yourself in the historical toilet of GUM. After reconstruction, a “Recreation Room” was opened here in 2012, which was popular among store visitors at the end of the 19th century. There is a red carpet leading to the toilet, cubicles of 4 m² each, two maids monitor the cleanliness. The price for a visit is corresponding - 84 rubles. But they say that if you are an important person at Bosco, then you are entitled to benefits.

But the visit is definitely worth the money. I remember once paying 20 rubles. for visiting the blue plastic analogue, but ended up at the Jackson Pollock exhibition, designed, however, in shades of brown. I still shudder at any manifestation of abstract expressionism.

But if you are a wheelchair user, then you are finally in luck. The new toilets have ramps and some sort of handicap-accessible gizmo inside. It looks terribly uncomfortable, but it’s still better than dooming yourself to wearing adult diapers for life. But I advise cores to use the cabin with caution. Although there is an emergency SOS button inside, according to some media, barely every fifth one works, so if your vision gets dark while sitting on the miracle toilet, it’s better to fall out into the street. You don’t want a heated group of homeless people to find you unconscious and, God forgive me, without pants.

And finally - a couple of good links. Here, for example, is an electronic atlas with all the public toilets in the capital (you need to open the “social environment” menu), and if you suddenly suffer from topographic cretinism, then this list will be very useful to you. Enjoy.

Like theirs.
The experience of Masha Dolgopolova

Of course, if you are not new to using public toilets, Nikita Koltsov’s story will only make you laugh. But don’t despair, there are still many places in the world that can excite even the most desperate messenger for affordable amenities. All you need is to drive a little away from Moscow.

Elbrus, stop
last lift

Having climbed very high, having changed several lifts, including one emergency one, you will probably get to the top prepared and immediately go in search of amenities. Do not give in to persuasion and under no circumstances go to warm cafes. You know what you need. A lonely wooden booth, designed for one person, is turned towards the approaching crowds with its back, and towards the wild nature - in front. The undoubted advantage of the booth is the absence of a door - if you come as a simple tourist, then you will not have a better opportunity to admire the snow-capped peaks. Having done your job, you can tickle your nerves even more - carefully approach the edge of the cliff and take a closer look. Most likely you will see it, a door that was torn off long ago. And when approaching the booth, be as loud as possible in case the room is in use - this way the visitor will have time to give a signal.

Train station in Gryazi, Lipetsk region

If you accidentally end up at the train station in the city of Gryazi, the idea of ​​using a public toilet is not the best one that can come to mind. But, if you are traveling on an old train that throws sewage directly onto the roadway and is closed at the stops in the old fashioned way, then you most likely have no choice. You can easily find a large gray square building. On both sides, as if diagonally, there are doors - for men and for women. It would seem that all decency was observed. Inside you will see that this is not the case. There are no partitions between the men's and women's departments - only neat holes in the floor extending beyond the horizon, located at a decent distance from each other.

Pyatigorsk highway -
Karachay-Cherkessia,
one of the stops

You will see a lot of interesting things along this scenic route. The main thing is, don’t refuse and get off at every stop and look everywhere for that legendary toilet. A dark, rickety building made of hastily knocked together boards, already slightly damaged by time. We enter and the first thing we notice is the extremely intimate atmosphere: fans of fashion photography would appreciate how beautifully the light shines on visitors, breaking through the cracks in the boards - no blinds needed. A detail that gourmets will appreciate: there are no partitions, traditional holes in the wooden floor are located in a circle. It seems that by the position a person takes in this public toilet (with his back to people, in front or sideways), diagnoses can be made.

Third Gorge, Pitsunda, Abkhazia

If you decide to retire for a while, forget about the Internet and live a wild life, the best choice would be a gorge in the heart of Abkhazia. To get to it, you will have to walk for two hours along the water and coastal rocks. As soon as you arrive, you will immediately understand that this is it. The pale rocky landscape will be replaced by a picturesque valley, which, like colored mushrooms, was strewn with the tents of hermits. Finding the toilet is quite simple - a special path will lead you to a small platform located slightly above sea level. The first thing you will see is a luxurious toilet, its architecture reminiscent of a mixture of a mansion with carved details and a brand new hut on chicken legs. But don't get your hopes up - this one is meant for special occasions. For everyday needs - a hole dug in the earthen floor with four iron sticks around the perimeter, the space between which is covered with not very carefully woven reeds. If you decide to explore Abkhazia properly, you can also recommend the toilet on Malaya Ritsa. To see this work, you need to walk for an hour along the road from Bolshaya Ritsa (the local police will indicate the direction) and about two to three hours off-road up the mountain. When you pass the ferns, see the breathtaking blue water and the forester's house - you have arrived. The forester's house is always closed, behind it there is a small cliff over which a huge tree is thrown. Just some 20 meters above the abyss on a log - and you are there. A cozy hole in the ground, carefully fenced with some kind of raincoat fabric, seemed to be waiting for you for half a century.

The topic of the program today is complex and very serious, despite the fact that it will probably make many people smile. We can at least imagine a public toilet: a stall on Red Square or a small pen with a woman watchman who, for 10 rubles, gives a small piece of toilet paper to each hand. I don’t want to use such a toilet; it is only needed for “emergency” cases. And if there is no toilet nearby, then the “emergency” of the case serves as an excuse for defecating on the wall of someone’s house. We have studied the experience of other countries, today after 20:00 we will talk about what public toilets look like in the city and what will happen if there are none nearby, but you just can’t stand it...

It will not be a big revelation if I say that all public places in Portugal are equipped with public toilets: they are in large shopping centers, train and bus stations, airports, streets and beaches, with the exception of the so-called “wild” ones. ", where the toilet, alas, is a traditional tree or bush. On the streets, toilet stalls can be seen more often in big cities than in small ones or, for example, in villages: there public toilets are represented by stationary structures made of brick (never made of wood, which can still be seen in Russia). Well, I didn’t see any cesspools there either. In addition, every restaurant or cafe, even the smallest one, is equipped with a toilet. If it is very small, they will definitely tell you where you can relieve yourself. For free. Only you should be their client. It’s worth knowing that if, as they say, you have an urge, you don’t have to order all sorts of pickles in order to get the coveted key to the water closet, which is closed to outsiders: just order a cup of coffee or buy yourself a bottle of water. That is, this practically means that in a crowded public place the toilet awaits you at every turn. But free, neat and clean - unfortunately, not always.

The most uncomfortable, disgusting toilets are located at train stations, if they are free, and for some reason in inexpensive nightclubs - probably because nightlife involves greater relaxation and significant amounts of alcohol consumed. In Lisbon, for example, in the early morning, somewhere in the Bairro Alto or Cais do Sudre area, you can meet their carousing visitors relieving themselves right on the street. That is why, last year, deputies of the City Council, together with the owners of retail and other institutions located next to the nightlife establishments, raised the issue with the city authorities about installing additional street toilets here.

On official beaches, toilets are usually quite decent and free. At the entrance, although less and less often, there may be some Portuguese lady sitting there, who cleans it from time to time during the day. On her table there is a plate with change. But whether you put money there, usually 20-50 cents, or not, depends on you.

Sometimes, literally before our eyes, a public toilet can become paid: for example, I was unpleasantly surprised that since last year at the Lisbon bus station Sete Rius, for visiting a previously free establishment, they suddenly began to charge half a euro (30 rubles): they put turnstile, and at first, until people got used to the innovation, the girl standing in front of it patiently explained how to make payment. Inside, behind the turnstile, it became clean and pleasant, but (or “and”, as you wish) the number of people noticeably decreased.

A newcomer to America is surprised by many things. One of them is that free public toilets are everywhere here: in shops, restaurants, gas stations. To use the restroom, you don’t need to be a customer or a guest - no one will ever refuse you to visit such an important room and ask for money for it. Surprisingly, this was not the case until recently.

In 1970, there were about 50,000 toilets in the United States, all of which were pay-to-use and generated $30 million in annual revenue. Apart from the owners of this business, no one was happy with this state of affairs, but only two high school students from Ohio, Ira and Michael Gessel, hated the paid toilets so much that they decided to act.

Together with two friends, the Hessel brothers organized the Committee Against Pay Toilets in America. At first, the teenagers were just having a good time, but soon they found like-minded people, began holding meetings and began publishing a newspaper with their parents’ money.

This problem, however, worried not only activists, but also politicians. In California, for example, Assemblywoman March Fong organized a demonstration directly in front of the local Capitol building. Protesters demonstratively smashed a toilet tied with chains, but the vast majority of legislators were not greatly impressed by the show. Politicians gave up, but Californians continued to pay to use public restrooms.

Meanwhile, the committee organized by the Gessel brothers continued its activities, and interested parties joined the heated public debate. The Nik-O-Lock company, the largest owner of toilets, frightened ordinary people that after the abolition of fees, abandoned restrooms would attract hippies, drug addicts and other undesirable elements. In response to this, Ira and Michael Gessel published the following: “When a man or woman must restrain their natural needs just because they do not have small coins, this is a violation of human rights.”

As a result, in January 1973, the brothers managed to organize a large-scale press conference in Chicago. The event, whose organizers argued that paid toilets were a violation of basic human rights, received widespread media coverage. This speech received so many responses that already in March of the same year, the mayor of Chicago declared all toilets in the city entrusted to him free. New York, California, and Alaska soon followed Chicago's example, and by 1980 there were no paid restrooms left in the United States.

No, public toilets were not invented in London, but by the ancient Greeks, they were quite common in the public baths of the Roman Empire, then throughout the Middle Ages this strange thing “public toilet” disappeared, and appeared again in the nineteenth century, first in Paris, then in 1820s in Berlin, and only then in the 1850s in London. The first public toilet in London opened on Fleet Street, and it was the first to have a flush system. This is a purely English invention, the toilet first appeared at the World Exhibition in 1851, organized by the Union of Craftsmen of England, it was opened by Queen Victoria, the exhibition was visited by 6 million people, 800 thousand of whom entered the only toilet room installed there as an experimental model, in where you could wash your hands, clean your clothes and use a flush toilet. This toilet was like a micro-Victorian palace-tent, and it proved so popular that its inventor, George Jennings, a plumber from Brighton, persuaded officials in London to install two similar ones in the city. Admission cost 2 pence, and within a year the men's toilet in Fleet Street and the women's toilet in Bedford Street brought in £1,000 in revenue. Newspapers wrote about how important cleanliness and hygiene are in these difficult times.

Public toilets didn't do much to improve the urban environment, of course. That year, 50 thousand horses served on public transport in London. A day, 20 thousand liters of horse urine and 500 tons of manure flowed onto the city's pavements; for every death from murder in Victorian London, there were 8 deaths from infectious diseases. Public toilets did not solve the problem of unsanitary conditions in the city, but they were very By the time this problem began to concern the city authorities, toilets began to spread rapidly. There are, as we know, two types of public toilets. Some are booths on the streets, others are rooms in public buildings. If you go into the old English club building on Pall Mall, you will notice that next to the restaurant there is only one toilet room - the men's. The women's room was built recently - 60 years ago, when women were allowed to enter this club. Therefore, in order to powder her nose, a lady should walk through two wings of the building, about 50 meters, to find a toilet room, converted for women from the former premises for club employees. If you want to see how democratic a country is, please note when a women's restroom was first opened in its parliament building. This did not always happen in the year when the first woman was elected as a deputy. In Australia, for example, the first female MP was in 1943, and the women's toilet in Parliament was in 1974. In Great Britain the first lady MP is 1919, and the women's toilet in parliament? Remember the film biography of Margaret Thatcher with Meryl Streep in the title role? She comes to Parliament, goes into the toilet room, and there is an ironing board for men's shirts. Women's restrooms are now everywhere, and you can pay attention to another thing that speaks to how the roles of men and women are perceived in society. In women's restrooms you will always find a folding table for changing babies. Sometimes the booth for changing diapers is a baby room, this is a separate room next to the men's and women's toilets. But only in Scandinavia are there toilets with a changing table in the toilet for dads. It's like dads don't change their kids' diapers.