How long does it take for him to heal his old wound? How to calculate BJU for weight loss
Olya Likhacheva
Beauty is like a precious stone: the simpler it is, the more precious :)
Content
In pursuit of a slender body, women and men are ready for much. What they just do not come up with: various activities, exercises, diets and fasting days to maintain physical fitness. A rational ratio of proteins, fats and carbohydrates for weight loss is an invariably popular and effective way to control weight, which is based on the use of a calorie calculator plus the calculation of BJU. Do you know all the features: what is it, what is the plus, how to calculate everything correctly? Let's figure it out in order!
What is BJU
An abbreviation that is widely used to denote 3 words: proteins, fats, carbohydrates - this is BJU. For competent weight loss and well-being in general, it is extremely important to maintain the energy balance of the body - what we get with food, and then spend during the day when walking, mental activity, playing sports. An excess or deficiency of a particular nutrient / mineral can play a cruel joke on health. It is important to ensure that the intake / consumption of energy was the right level.
The main sources of BZHU are food. For example, from meat, fish, milk and eggs, the body will be saturated with a large amount of protein. Vegetables, flour products and even chocolate are rich in carbohydrates. Including oil and fatty meat on the menu, we get fats. However, it is better to choose unsaturated organic compounds - their optimal amount is in seeds, oily fish, and nuts. It is important that the diet is balanced, the regimen is thoughtful, all these elements are present in the norm.
Optimal ratio of protein, fat and carbohydrates
The norm of BZHU is determined for each individually, "we are repelled" at the same time from weight, age, gender, activity. However, nutritionists are of the opinion that the optimal proportion is 1: 1: 4. This guarantees a balanced diet and the intake of the required amount of kcal. For athletes and muscle growth, the distribution formula is different - 1: 0.8: 4, and for gaining a large mass, the need for carbohydrates will double.
BJU norm for weight loss
Do you want to get slimmer? Then the calculation of the BZHU for weight loss in percentage will have a different form. You can start the fat burning process by increasing the percentage of proteins (white meat, eggs, seafood, cottage cheese, milk and kefir) and reducing carbohydrates (sweets, pastries, pasta, potatoes). Do not go to extremes, arrange yourself tests at a minimum - maintain the ratio of proteins, fats and carbohydrates for weight loss "adequate". The main thing is to know the optimal combination. Plus, do not hesitate to exercise: muscle tone is good. Don't forget about healthy sleep.
The ratio of BJU for weight loss for women
We take a person's daily ration as a conditional 100%. You will begin to lose weight if you follow a diet that consists of 30-35% proteins, 10-25% fats, 45-50% correct carbohydrates. If you are going to go through drying, then you need to observe the reduction of carbohydrates and fats to a minimum. The ideal percentage of BJU for weight loss is 30: 20: 50%. Girls do not need to give up fats, their mass should be within normal limits, because they play an important function for the body (they affect the health of the reproductive system, the synthesis of hormones, are needed for hair and nails).
How to calculate BJU for weight loss
First, it is important to determine the calorie content that the body needs for a day, and then you can calculate the BJU for weight loss. So, a few steps:
- Calculation of the metabolic rate: 655 + (9.6 * current weight in kilograms) + (1.8 * your height) - (4.7 * full years).
- We will adjust for your activity: very low (constantly sit) - 1.20, small (exercise a couple of times a week) - 1.38, medium (up to 5 times a week with a low load) - 1.55, high (do intensive and difficult training) - 1.73.
- We subtract 500 calories from the result obtained, we get the daily allowance, for example, 1500.
- You can expand the limit: + -200 calories (1300-1700). Below - already harm to the body, slow metabolism, hormonal disruption. Above - forget that you will lose weight, on the contrary, excess weight will be gained, because the proceeds will not be spent.
How much protein do you need per day for weight loss
Based on the information received and knowledge about the level of substances, it can be summed up that the norm of proteins for weight loss is 1300 (calories) * 0.30 (normal protein level) / 4 (kcal per 1 g), i.e. 97.5 g This is the lower limit. The upper one will be 1700 * 0.35 / 4 = 149 g. Your allowable intake is 97-149 g. Remember, falling below the limit means putting the body under increased stress. Instead of burning fat, you get stagnant metabolism.
How much fat do you need per day for weight loss
In the same way, we calculate the amount of fat during weight loss. Formula minimum: 1300 (calories) * 0.15 (normal fat) / 9 (kcal per 1 g), i.e. 22 g.Upper limit: 1700 * 0.20 / 9 = 38 g. If you increase the grams , then you will not achieve the effect of losing weight. Stick to the recommended indicators (in our case, from 22 to 38 g) and you will definitely see the result.
How many carbohydrates do you need per day for weight loss
The third group of our ratio is considered in exactly the same way. The minimum carbohydrate intake per day for weight loss will be 146 g: 1300 (calories) * 0.45 (normal level) / 4 (kcal per 1 g). At the same time, the upper threshold for active weight loss is 191 g: 1700 * 0.50 / 4. Consider that you need to give up fast calories - chocolate, cookies, chips, crackers, bananas, potatoes are also prohibited. They are not our helpers in the fight with the extra hateful weight! You need slow companions.
What carbohydrates can you eat while losing weight
It is recommended to consume "complex" foods that contain fiber. They will saturate cells with useful components. Replace soda and snacks with broccoli, lettuce, cabbage, only durum pasta, brown rice, buckwheat, beans, lentils. Carbohydrates for weight loss should be those where the starch content is minimal. Corn, legumes, grain products - leave for better times.
Formula for calculating BZHU
The ratio of proteins, fats and carbohydrates for weight loss can be different - we figured it out. It is easy to calculate BJU for weight loss, it does not take much time. The nutrition program is drawn up individually, because the calorie counter, the percentage of organic compounds may vary. A balanced combination of diet, exercise and rest will help you lose weight. Determine the best option yourself or online with a calculator!
Calculation of BZHU on an online calculator
You can not bother with calculations, but use the online calculator BZHU. All you need is to write down your weight, height, gender, goals (lose / gain weight), lifestyle. The system will calculate the rest automatically. No decryption needed. The calculator will help you answer such questions.
Ask a psychologist
Hello Anton Mikhailovich! By chance, I completely wandered into this site, I really liked the detailed recommendations that you give to "heart patients" and not only them.)) I apologize in advance for the upcoming long presentation, but I wanted to describe the situation in more detail.
I'm 35, my beloved 43. We live three together with my daughter from our first marriage. He has an adult son from his first marriage who lives with his ex-wife. They lived with their ex for almost 14 years together, kept the illusion of a happy marriage for the last three years, for sure, until the son grew up. The wife walked and you can understand (see below). After 1.5 years after our life together, he officially divorced. At the same time, that day I said in advance in the evening - I will bring a gift, the gift turned out to be a divorce stamp. At the moment, for three years we have been living together (!), We are doing everything together and cleaning and repairing and lessons .. Everything is fine .. almost))
After 2 years of living together in the fall (after the wedding season), I asked, what's next for me / us? What did I hear that I was not ready yet, I just got divorced, how long have you lived after the divorce (I am 6 years old)? He says that his acquaintances got married after 10 years of marriage, I asked me to wait so much, I can not wait, you do not say anything at all and do not promise? Later, because I was dumbfounded, gave an example that my friend was made an offer in 2 weeks, they have been living for 15 years and cherish each other. She said that she was hoping for this autumn, but you are silent, it is a shame even to raise this topic. She freaked out, wrote in an SMS that the deadline is August (a year after raising this topic in the first place) and the relationship is over.
I read how one woman on December 30, three years later said without hysterics, or give an answer with a specific deadline, or we will already meet NG separately. We got married. But blackmail is not the best method, but when will it ripen on its own ??? I'm looking forward to the end of the year. But will the language turn to say this ...
His parents are silent about the wedding at all, they promised to come, they called them 5 times for sure, but there were many reasons because of which they could not: they were ill all winter, they treated their teeth ... only as the summer season came, everything went abruptly and they were at the dacha ( is also an indicator of interest in me and my daughter). Friends ask about "more kids" - is silent. I have heard the phrase many times, if I promise something, it will not come true. Stamp, like superstition, it seems, too, is afraid)) He knows that I want another child, that he is very dear to me, but I can’t wait forever, tk. no longer a girl, I want certainty. He himself confirmed that he would like a child. His grown-up son turns to him only when he cannot sort out his problems himself, and he does not call at all and does not even call back.
Recently, sex sometimes does not happen even for three months (and what was in the beginning - I did not give sleep at all))). I said that it is unhealthy and I tried to give articles on this topic to read. He kisses his forehead, hugs him, strokes his clothes in places, but how to sleep - I'm tired, chronic lack of sleep, overeat ... Yes, when we met weighed 20 kg less. Well, we are not seventy! She even somehow stuck that there would be no supper until I “had enough”. I began to read topics on the forums asking why a loved one avoids in bed and came across his (!) Statement on this matter: "An angry and quarrelsome wife greatly reduces everything." One of the interlocutors asks, "Why is she so angry and quarrelsome?" (We step on the rake again, as with our ex-wife, but already with me?). I love him, he says that too. But lately, I have been expressing my dissatisfaction with my joint friends, who also complain that their wives are ignored. I know this is wrong, but how long can you always be the first otherwise ignored? Already, too, she became grumpy .. On the streets, familiar strangers, dog lovers or employees of a beauty salon, even in front of me, are smiling at him with all a broad smile (butter) and he replies with smiles, about what happens without me -? I said that it was not pleasant for me. He says that he doesn’t know them and why he (!) Doesn’t smile.)) In fact, he needs to be nervous, because pah-pah I look great for my age. In spite I always try (!) To look in full dress and only to go out with my head held high when I leave for work in the morning, because looks and other attention on the streets does not interest me. Happy women wear jeans. I rush in vain, everything is fine, or is it still (!) So comfortable for him, until he meets better, although he says that he is not looking for anyone, but who will confess?
If a person does not receive something at home, he will look for it on the side. My first marriage broke up, and one of the reasons - after the birth of my daughter, my husband openly came closer to the night and told tales that he was at business meetings, although he never refused to go to bed. He just seemed tired of “caviar again”. Personally, I drew conclusions.
Everything is fine with my dear and beloved, it functions, at night very often I see him in all its glory. I don’t even know who he is constantly dreaming about, he says that he doesn’t remember)) Yeah))) Thoughts are already visiting in spite of refusing, when he wants love or even cooler - a hand and heart, if, of course, he offers.)))))
This year it turns out that I begged for a ring on February 14: I was offended that I did not give anything, even a flower (she says that she does not consider it a holiday), I went to my daughter to check the lessons, I stand in front of her table (my birthday is literally nearby), I walked in from the back (!) and handed the box forward to me. My heart skipped a beat, but the interrogation showed that this gold ring with a brulant just for 35 years, a personal gift))
What does my daughter think of me, I don’t even know .. mom-friend?
Just a couple of times I touched on the topic of marriage, after 2 years, I don't drink every day. I try not to be nervous, I walk around smiling, but every day the thoughts are the same: he doesn’t get married - it’s not needed - it means that the child and the joint future are under a big question - time is ticking.
I don't want to lose, look for anyone too! How long does it take for him to heal his old wound ??? Nothing pleases, even the favorite season is the upcoming warm summer.
I beg you, please explain our situation. Thank you in advance.
Psychologists' Answers
"Caviar again" seems to have bothered him. Personally, I drew conclusions.
"Caviar again", alas, annoys everyone. I will quote on this occasion a statement that I made within the framework of one round table here, so as not to drive you through the links:
The fact that sexual desire naturally decreases is inevitable. The passion that initially pushed people to a stormy one is passing away, and it is being replaced by calmer relationships. And one of the main reasons why everything comes to a standstill (attraction disappears altogether) - the unwillingness of the spouses to understand that it is necessary to invest efforts, imagination and do it consciously in sexual relations.
Most perceive sexual desire as something "for granted" (and is very surprised when it "suddenly" disappears), or as something that "comes" (as a gift from heaven or nature), but also "leaves" (sort of like for reasons beyond human control). And the lot of such spouses is either betrayal, or life with the feeling that all emotions are over and it is necessary to live on only for the sake of children or everyday life.
Nature gives a person only an initial impulse, but does not connect him to the "warranty service" of sexual attraction. If you look at the animal world, there are rare cases in nature when a couple lives together for a long time. Most often, partners are changed from year to year. with one partner for 20, 30 or more years - a thing for nature is not very natural. But a person chooses such a relationship due to other factors that are important and fundamental for a person. And therefore, he must (and can!) Build up his sexual desire, "reach" the level of his spiritual needs.
If you want to get new sensations, emotions, relax - you are going to have a rest, right? And before that, you need to choose a place, order tickets, think over routes, pack your bags, settle issues with your family ... That's all - about normal marital sex. After 3-4-5 years of marriage, it is no longer worth waiting for the attraction to flare up "between times" - you can wait a long time. It is worth doing exactly this: planning, fantasizing, inventing and ultimately implementing what was conceived effectively, with arrangement, with comfort and when nothing interferes.
If you manage to introduce such a concept into your family, I think there will be fewer problems. But for this you have to talk about it with a man. Ask him to remember how it was with his wife - the same? The passion passed, and then everything began to resemble the maintenance of an illusion? So, perhaps it was because his attitude to marriage, sex, building relationships, was not sufficiently conscious?
This does not mean "it is my own fault", and it is desirable that it does not sound like that. But to convey to him the idea that in any marriage passion is never eternal, and you need to make efforts to maintain it - you may well. The question is, will he be ready to do it. But you can try!
More about sex. Very often women think that it is enough to be "on the parade", to look good, and as an option - to wear beautiful lingerie, stockings, etc. But who said that all this excites all men? Not all of them. For many (if not most), the exciting factor is novelty. And what is the novelty of your appearance "at the parade" and even in stockings, etc., if he has seen all this already? Newness is another matter entirely. Different place, different time, different behavior, new games.
And to start all this - you need to talk about it. Asking what he would like, what fantasy would he like to fulfill? Very often from men you can hear something completely different from what women expect - "put on high-heeled shoes, let's go to a restaurant ...." Rather, something like "let's have sex in the car / on the roof / under a bush / in a different form - change roles, etc. " Men have a different idea of romance and arousal. And the stereotype of a woman in lace lingerie is more of a fashion trend, and nothing more)
General emotions can also help good sex. For example, general impressions of what turns you on in principle - theaters, concerts, sports competitions, trips to nature and not only - travel in general, any thrills that do not directly relate to sex. But in the end they influence him strongly. After all, they "shake up" a person, especially a man, whose need for strong and acute emotions is sometimes higher than that of a woman. And then all this is safely projected onto sex, while there is also more strength, because the thrill greatly adds energy.
But blackmail is not the best method, but when will it ripen on its own ??? I'm looking forward to the end of the year. But will the language turn to say this ...
Do you really need a stamp in your passport? After all, he, by and large, does not guarantee anything. Perhaps it is worth talking in a different way. You want certainty for the foreseeable future. So ask him, does he himself need this certainty? And if she is only in words - will it suit him? If he tells you - "I want to be together, I want a child, but I am not ready to put a stamp yet" - and what is so terrible about that for you? Think about it. Do you still need a man or a status?
You should not exclude such a possibility - as soon as you stop waiting for this, the man will feel that you are more independent than he would like. And a man often wants to feel himself the master of the situation. And while the woman is expecting and hoping something from him, he, in his own way, prolongs the severity of the situation. And when she takes an easy step back (stops asking, stops showing that she is directly interested in marriage), she again becomes an object of conquest ... And all this does not mean at all to run away from him and part. You can make it clear what you will invest in the relationship. Till. And then we'll see ... If nothing works out, then it won't work out. And as soon as it becomes clear that there are "possible options" inside you, then a man may again want to conquer you.
I think that he is not afraid of the stamp. And boredom and routine. And in general, he has reasons. It doesn't matter why it happened in his last marriage, but the point, I think, is not in "licking the wounds", but rather in the fact that he does not understand where the way out of this boredom is. He may still be unaware of the simple truth that there is no eternal passion. Check out this article:
http://zerkalodushi.ru/crysis-three-years
There, in more detail - what I'm talking about specifically in this paragraph.
And this idea that relations will have to be built - not many like it. I would like everything to be "self" and at the same time "eternal and beautiful". And when this does not work out, a person begins to look for reasons "why nothing is working out" and to look for the guilty ones. And the result is the same: boredom, inability to overcome it, deepening disagreements and, as a result, the feeling that "love has passed" and divorce. Most likely, this is what he is afraid of.
There is only one option - to talk, to tell, to learn to build relationships, and bring it to the family. And so that you also know how to resolve conflicts competently - here is a "guide":
http://psyhelp24.ru/conflict-resolution/
I think if you comprehend all this and come up with a competent solution to the issue, everything will work out. And if it is really difficult - contact us.
Sincerely,
Nesvitsky Anton Mikhailovich, psychologist St. Petersburg
Have you asked yourself this question?
Hope, when can I start a sexual relationship with a man I like? Will he think I'm a whore if I do it on the first date? Will he lose interest in me if I keep him waiting?
A very common question. And I would like to have a short and very specific answer to it. For example “on the third date” or “in a month”. But there is no such answer. It depends on many factors. From what kind of man he is (and what is his attitude towards women and sex). It depends on what you want from a relationship with him (only sex, relationship, marriage). It also depends on why YOU WANT sex with him. As always, I am breaking the question down.
I talk about this a lot and often, because I really want to convey this idea to all the women who read me. For men, sex does not have the same emotional significance that it has for women. Men, of course, think a lot about sex, fantasize about almost every pretty woman in their field of vision, and very much follow their testosterone cravings. Men really want sex (and want it with many women ... and despite this, they are capable of a monogamous relationship with a woman for whom they have feelings). But despite the fact that men are so strongly interested in sex that they can even be manipulated, after this very, so desired sex has happened for them, it does not become at least any significant event in their life.
To put it simply: sex for a man is more interesting BEFORE it happened than AFTER, and the very first time with a woman is much more important than all subsequent ones.
Here are the reasons I think are sufficient for having sex with the man with whom you started dating:
1. Because you sincerely like him, you know him well enough and trust him, and you feel comfortable with him. You are pleased with his presence and his touch.
2. Because you haven't had sex for a long time and you want a permanent partner.
3. Just because you want it right now.
In all these situations, there is nothing wrong if you understand well why you are doing this, and what this relationship will be like in the future.
Very bad reasons:
1 ... Because he harasses and presses on you, but you yourself are not yet ready for this. (Don't be afraid to lose it, you definitely don't need it).
2 ... Because you think that after sex you will like him more or that he will fall in love with you, impressed by your art. I have to upset you: this will not happen. This is a tricky joke of biology, but ...
For women: sex creates a feeling of love and intimacy.
For men: sex enhances the feelings that are already there - but does not create any new feelings.
This is another way to reiterate that sex won't make a man fall in love.
And also, for most men, there is no logical connection between the fact that you slept and the fact that you have a serious relationship with him.
Unless you specifically said that you are a couple, that you do not meet with others, it will not be taken for granted for him (and you will be shocked and beside yourself with anger when you learn that he is dating others) ...
2. What do you want from this relationship?
Do you only want sex and are not interested in a long-term relationship?
Or does your heart skip a beat when you see it and you dream of a wedding and come up with names for your children?
Decide on your intentions before engaging in sexual relations with him.
And finally
3. Who is he?
Although all men are interested in sex, they all have different ideas about sexual relations, how serious it is and what it means personally for him. There are very conservative or religious men for whom sexual relations is a very serious step and automatically implies exclusivity.
So I summarize and answer the question
1. If you like this man and want to build a serious relationship with him, build a relationship. Take the time to get to know him and let him get to know you.
It doesn’t have to be months or years, but it’s enough time to develop the relationship and make him achieve you, and not get everything without any effort.
2. If you are not planning a serious relationship with him, then it is easier here - just take care of your safety, make sure of his decency and have fun.
Today the dating ritual is gradually dying out. Usually young people meet and walk in the same company until they suddenly sleep with each other (of course, out of mutual sympathy), and then they begin to walk in the same company as a couple. Dinner invitations or movie invitations are already extremely rare. Even if we meet with someone one-on-one, then most likely before that we had been texting for weeks on social networks. So to say what a first date is, and generally determine where to start a relationship, is difficult. Therefore, it is difficult to answer when we allow the first sex in a relationship.
When I asked my friend who works as a family counselor, she said, "6 months." Not "When Both Are Ready" or something like that. Just "6 months". It is worth saying that besides the fact that she herself is very sexy, she is also an excellent specialist, a very intelligent and sensitive person, but, damn it, 6 months? I practically laughed in her face before realizing she wasn't joking.
In my opinion, this is too unrealistic. I would answer: 2-3 weeks, or a few dates - as long as you need to understand that you want a longer relationship with a person, but not so long that abstinence from sex is his own problem.
We talked with a friend, and our arguments turned out to be the same, but the terms are still different. We agreed that having sex too early is a bad idea, although we did not find a middle ground, which means “too early”.
We also agreed that in this matter a woman should be a “guard”. In fact, this is the only valid solution. Guys always want sex, and as long as we can cool them off before things get too far, this is a certain willpower that few of us have. On the other hand, women know how to masterfully turn a man on and leave halfway. It should be so. Otherwise, sex would always be on the first date, and in general at the first date.
At the same time, in favor of men, it is worth noting that their opinion about a woman after sex does not change (only if it was not terrible). But if you wait a little, when a connection arises on the emotional and intellectual levels, then sex will only strengthen it, your connection. Thus, a man sees that what for him is just a part of human existence (sex) is more important for you, and if you decide to do this with him, then you make the man feel special. Therefore, if you wait a bit, then a man will rather raise his self-esteem than appreciate your act. But nonetheless.
But this does not mean that a girl cannot have sex on the first date. We live in the days after "Sex and the City", so if you are lonely, if you just broke up with a guy, then why not find someone with whom you can just have fun? But if you want a relationship, then you need to slow down at least a little with sex.
